Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Lots......



Well here goes, Friday March 27th we had Bailee's Fancy Nancy Party it was a huge success. All the girl had a great time and so did Bailee. At 3:00 pm the hot water heater went out oh lovely!! We call a plumber who comes out at 9:00 pm and tells us yes you need a new one we can do it parts, labor, heater and 10 year warranty for $1235. Oh the joys of being a homeowner. Thankfully we still had some tax return money, but it was vacation money!!! Anyways that next day they are there putting in the new one. Boy do we have hot water. At 3:00 that afternoon I had scheduled a spa party like I needed to have another party that weekend!! Hello what is wrong with me? The party was fun, but then we got all these Tornado warnings and yes take cover all this bla bla bla stuff, the news people are really getting to were they are so overreactive. Yes im still just as afraid of tornado's as always but good grief they go overboard.

So that was a very busy 2 days. Then I remembered oh yeah we volunteered to keep two seminary students overnight on Sunday. I had told them to just use us as a backup well we were needed. SO now im off to washing towels, changing sheets, cleaning the house up once again. We had some of the sweetest girls to stay with us they were awesome I totally enjoyed them being here. My kids loved them too, Bailee keeps referring to them as the sweet girls that stayed with us. That Monday I had to have them at the church by 10:30, Bailee and Bella had a doc visit at 11:00, I had the grocery store, Dance, and all kinds of stuff to do that day. Whew I feel tired all over again just thinking of how tired I was. Tuesday of course was school, Wednesday we went to the park with bryson's friend emillie, Thursday was school, Friday we of course did our usual running around, Saturday I had rehearsal for a drama I was in at church.

Now let me slow down and explain this drama. I was to have this monologue of inner thoughts about being a stay at home mom and all the stresses I feel. Well this was a piece of cake for me I told them you will be getting the real deal here!! My monologue was as follows:
"Mom, Mom, ugh if I hear that one more time im going to change my name. On days like today when the kids just wont get ALONG, and the baby will not stop SCREAMING I could very well loose my mind. There is all this pressure on me to be a mom, a wife, take care of the house, cooking, cleaning, mounds and mounds of laundry, changing diapers. I spend all day meeting everyone's needs. But what about my needs? just because im a mom does not mean I dont have needs. Like to be able to go to the grocery store and not hear MOM HE HIT ME, or MOM I GOTTA GO PEE, or trying to keep the baby from once again wiggling herself out of the strap and standing up in the seat of a moving buggy!! Im just so tired!!"
After my monologue 3 other people said theirs then the Jesus Character came to each one of us for us to pour our cup into His and our song director told me he wanted me to give Jesus attitude like it was just someone else coming to bother me, attitude I can do but it felt weird doing it to a Jesus character. But anyways it turned out to be a great drama, everyone said they thought my part was funny, I told them that was my life.!!

So now that brings me to this week. Monday was not so busy, Bryson didnt go to music because once again he was not cooperating at all and I was not about to go and put on this fake happy face at music as thought i was bubbling over with Joy to be singing songs with my son who at the moment I just was really not happy with. Bailee did not have dance that night yeah! So during their nap time I thought I have got to come up with something to get him to cooperate with me every morning because its like that every single day and it just makes my day just start horrible. So I came up with a reward system where they earn play money and at the end of the week they can buy things that I have gotten from the Dollar tree such as candy, pencils, stickers, and so on. Well Bryson said im going to cooperate. Tuesday morning when I go in to wake him for school, I thought to myself yes its going to work, He earned a dollar because yes he did cooperate.

Now so much for my wishful thinking because we get to school and we start having a melt down about something he wants to do I tell him NO and what his options are and he just continues in this horrible fit of ugliness!!!!! So it of course just escalates to a very unhealthy ugly scene with me crying and all upset, its time for kids to be arriving at school and I cant even hold it together to deal with my class. I am just so tired of all this, I feel like getting in the car and taking 3 days to myself, just to regain my sanity. I am trying all these different things to make this behavior stop and it all seems to be a failure!! I am standing my ground with them and following thru on everything I tell them will happen if they dont act right and that is killing me worse than just giving in....Im not so sure I can make it through this stage!!! I know that once we get past this that it will be so much better in the long run but OH MY LORD I NEED HELP making it thru till then. OK im so sorry that I have vented and posted such a long post but I feel better now. I will post pictures from Bailee's party and then I also have pictures from the park but I will post them on another post since I made this one so long!

2 comments:

RichFam said...

Father God, I come to You today in prayer for my dear friend, April. Lord, she is stressed and needs some peace in the midst of her currently chaotic life. I pray that You will grant her that everlasting peace. I pray that you will help her to remember that she is not alone in the situations she is facing, and that it happens to all moms at different intervals in their lives. I pray that you will enable her to see the heart issues that go beyond the behavior displayed by her children, and that You will be with her as she puts forth the effort to keep things under control. And most importantly, Father, I pray that while she is facing situations like the one she described in this blog post, You will grant her the ability to step outside of it all, and just be able to laugh about it. Help her find the joy in each situation, Lord. Enable her to see them comically and laugh hysterically, while you give her the strength to overcome them. And I pray that you will help her to always know that she has friends who are with her in prayer, who are going through the same things, and that she is very, very loved. Thank you, Lord, for your mercy and your grace.
In the name of your precious Son, Jesus,
Amen.

April... Always know that if you get to feeling crazy with the kids you can call me up any time. I am always home and am usually feeling the same way, so we can just be crazy together. Love you, girl. :o)
{{{HUGS}}}

Misty Burns said...

girl...that really old michael jackson song comes to mind..the line that says "you are not alone...I am hear with you" hahahha. I have been where you are! and yes, it will get better. EVENTUALLY. Hang in there, and yes, if you need to get away...come on down by yourself and hang with us. ya know southwest in running specials on 49 to 69 dollar one way tickets. you could fly into new orleans, and we can pick u up! :) anyway, I will keep you in my prayers. Isabella is a good baby, but I already see her strong will coming out. ugh! it is only begining with her. what makes your situation more difficult is that all of your babies are so close in age! and that makes a huge difference. I remember losing my mind with abigial and elijah. wew...made you wanna pack up your bags and never look back. hahaha. not that i would ever really do that...just saying. Your sanity will return again..i promise. but do not be afraid to get away..even if it is just to your moms house. or go see a movie with no one but yourself. hanna montana is coming out...hahahaha. feel free to vent anytime. we are all listening. :)
we love u!